Woman Killed Trying To Find Pope Lick Monster

The “Pope Lick Monster” has claimed another life…sort of. Where are agents Scully and Mulder when you need ’em?

There’s a Billy Goats Gruff joke to be made here, somewhere.

Let’s start with some background. The creature, who is supposed to haunt Pope Lick Creek in Louisville, Kentucky, is said to be a goat (or in some variations, a sheep) who walks like a man. It’s basically a satyr on opposite day, who can manipulate his voice in order to trick stupid, sexy teenagers into killing themselves at the Pope Lick railroad trestle.

The origins of the creature vary by account. He is either the ghost of a goat farmer who dabbled in witchcraft, a circus freak who just wants friends, or a straight-up demon. Now, the forces of hell are probably not trying to enslave Kentucky just yet…but that has not stopped people from trying to find him.

And after all the contributions talking sheep have made to this country you’d think they’d have better PR.

Now, here’s where things go sour. You know that creepy, abandoned Pope Lick railroad trestle I just mentioned? Oh, wait, I didn’t say it was abandoned… because it ain’t. If you try to find the monster without permission at the bridge, you could be charged with trespassing.

And you’d be the lucky ones.

Roquel Bain, a 26 year old tourist from Ohio, tried to find the monster with her boyfriend at the trestle. Unfortunately, they were investigating when the train came along. The boyfriend managed to survive by hanging off from the side. Ms. Bain, on the other hand, was not so lucky. She was run over and her body was found 100 feet below the accident.

It’s just so sad—a very pretty young girl who had her life in front of her. It’s just so preventable,” said a coroner in a released statement. “I see a train pass every 30 minutes or so,” added an unnamed local. “It’s shocking, people hear about so many deaths and they still take the risk.”

That’s why we at Viral Pirate feel obliged to release the following message:

Please do not go out and try to find any talking satyrs that like to kill people… that would be crazy even if they were real. And make sure that the “abandoned” highways or railroads you’re going to investigate are actually abandoned. And always remember, talking sheep are your friends!

They don’t exactly have time for your shit…but they are not going to kill you.


This Jersey Boy's a graduate of Rutgers University, but his heart will always belong to his hometown of Manhattan. And it's pronounced "Wit-2"...maybe, I should trademark that...