‘Hedgehog Officer’ Is Now a Real Job You Can Get

After Brexit, there’s great concern regarding what will happen to the British people. Between issues with the economy and migrants, there is still hope for the United Kingdom, at least the town-area of Ipswich. And that’s because they are hiring official hedgehog officers.

What a time to be alive!

Today, in hedgehog news…

Now, the job appears to involve monitoring hedgehogs so that the information could be used to develop accessible habitats. Being developed by the British Hedgehog Preservation Society and People’s Trust for Endangered Species, there is no worry about having to kill or arrest the hedgehogs.The whole point of the job involves helping the hedgehog population grow, and we’re not talking about Sonic.

Keeping them from getting in with the wrong crowd, like foxes, for starters.

We fear up to a third of the UK’s hedgehogs have been lost,” the trust explained in a released statement. “They seem to be disappearing from urban, suburban and rural areas, suggesting there are multiple factors involved, rather than a single cause. This is why the trust is leading a county-wide call to action, to stand up for hedgehogs, before it’s too late.

In addition to watching the hedgehog, and getting paid for it, those who get the job are also expected to run hedgehog roadshows. These shows are said to help inspire communities to get involved with hedgehog related activities. So basically, you get to watch hedgehogs, play with hedgehogs, save the hedgehogs, and get paid for doing something most sane people would pay to do. Because hedgehogs.

There ain’t no party like a Hedgehog party.

The jobs pays £24,000 a year for a two-year contract. Interested applicants need to apply by July 13 @ suffolkwildlifetrust.org. Unfortunately, you need experience… now, I know what you are thinking — how the hell can you have experience as a hedgehog officer when they literally just made it up? Well, experience with ecological surveying and community involvement is important. Also, you probably have to actually live in the Ipswich area. So, if all your hedgehog dreams are just a plane ride away, go east, my friends, go east.

Unless, of course, you already live East of Ipswich, then go west, my friends, go west!

[Ipswich Star]

This Jersey Boy's a graduate of Rutgers University, but his heart will always belong to his hometown of Manhattan. And it's pronounced "Wit-2"...maybe, I should trademark that...